Say what you mean – Stop Whining, Start Living

I read and listen to a lot of personal transformation books. Some book titles are so direct that you don’t even need to read the book to get the message however reading them might prove to be useful.

Here are a few of my favorite titles.

There Is Nothing Wrong With You
Cheri Huber

What You Think of Me is None of My Business
Terry Cole-Whittaker

All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten
Robert Fulghum

It’s Called Work for a Reason
Larry Winget

Stop Whining, Start Living
Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Why Men Love Bitches
Sherry Argov

Sometimes I feel that we should communicate just as clearly and directly, it might save a few hours of trying to explain something that only requires a few sentences.

happy reading,


Where are, you stuck in your life?

A lot has been written about the power of beliefs and with good reason: beliefs are very powerful. What is a belief? According to the dictionary a belief is:

An acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists; something one accepts as real or true; a firmly held opinion or conviction.

Many of us have been exposed to conflicting philosophies through family, friends, the media, society, religion and spirituality. The fact is we were instructed, trained and taught by family, school systems and the environment around us.

We were conditioned by our environment and surroundings.

The images and ideas communicated to us can be quite forceful on a subconscious level. Like most, you probably have some inherited beliefs that work and others that don’t and it would be too daunting a task to try to figure out where they all originated.

Therefore, how can you tell if you have a belief that doesn’t work for you? Ask yourself, where do I lose power in my life? With money, work, joy, health, friends, family? What problems keep appearing? Where are, you stuck in your life?

If you are often struggling; lacking in direction; or having difficulty achieving your goals and desires, you may find you are unconsciously or consciously carrying beliefs that aren’t working for you.

Face your challenges head on with the core belief that problems are just speed bumps on the road to your dreams. And from that place, when you take massive action-with an effective and proven strategy-you will rewrite your history.

Tony Robbins



Resistance does not lead to change, acceptance does

Wise words by Cheri Huber, Zen teacher and writer.

It is a waste of time and energy to resist what is. Then why do we spend our lives in resistance? Because resistance maintains our sense of who we are by saying “no” to everything that doesn’t support our identity.

Identity is maintained by repetitious thoughts spoken by authoritarian voices telling endless stories about who we are and then judging us for not measuring up to some ill-defined standard.

Identity is maintained by holding the body configurations that produce emotional states that reinforce resistance.

Examples: clenched jaw, tensed shoulders

Identity is maintained by never examining the belief that “IF I FEEL THIS, I MUST DO THAT”.

The message is that resistance is necessary because life is threatening.

When resistance fails to produce the desired changes in our lives, we rarely let go, move into the present, and see other possibilities. We tighten more, tense hard, and attempt to control more completely.

But resistance does not lead to change. Acceptance leads to change.

by Cheri Huber

Zen Teacher and Writer





A method for increasing self-esteem

The purpose of this method is to help you increase your self-esteem and  self-confidence. If you are having a difficult time believing in yourself this would certainly help you to strengthen your will and dissolve self-doubt.

Everyday for the next 30 days choose one word from each letter A to Z that is positive, inspirational and helpful to you. Write the words “I am” before each word.


  • I am able.
  • I am beautiful.
  • I am caring.
  • I am dependable.
  • I am elegant.
  • I am freedom.

You get the idea.

If you want to make it fun. You can use difficult colour pens. 

Remember you have nothing to prove to anyone.  Like and approve of yourself just as you are.





Nature rejoices in simplicity and nature is no dummy.

Simplicity Quotes

Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.

Beauty of style and harmony and grace and good rhythm depend on simplicity.

I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.
-Lao Tzu

Our life is frittered away by detail… simplify, simplify.
-Henry David Thoreau

It is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all.
-Laura Ingalls Wilder

If you can’t explain it to a six year old, you don’t understand it yourself.
-Albert Einstein

Nothing is more simple than greatness; indeed, to be simple is to be great.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Nature is pleased with simplicity. And nature is no dummy.
-Isaac Newton

Simplicity is the keynote of all true elegance.
-Coco Chanel

A little simplification would be the first step toward rational living, I think.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

If your mind isn’t clouded by unnecessary things, this is the best season of your life.
-Wu- Men

Plain question and plain answer make the shortest road out of most perplexities.
-Mark Twain

The word enlightenment conjures up the idea of some superhuman accomplishment, and the ego likes to keep it that way, but it is simply your natural state of felt oneness with Being.
-Eckhart Tolle

We struggle with the complexities and avoid the simplicities.
-Norman Vincent Peale

Desires must be simple and definite. They defeat their own purpose should they be too many, too confusing, or beyond a man’s training to accomplish.
-George S. Clason

Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day.
-Jim Rohn




You can’t be a victim and expect to heal your past.

Life may not seem fair or you may have been born into less than desirable conditions and these events can stick with you for a long time.

What happens to many is that their stories begin to define them, so they make decisions and choices from a place of powerlessness and they embody the victim mentality.

There are perks to being in a victim mentality,

  • you get attention, love and validation
  • you don’t have to take responsibility for your life
  • you have the right to complain
  • others get to pity you
  • people are less likely to criticize you
  • others feel compelled to help you
  • you get to stay stuck in your drama

Focusing on your old story isn’t serving you and blaming others may provide temporary relief but it will also keep you stuck and it may lead you to feelings of powerlessness.

Forgiving those who have hurt or disappointed you isn’t an easy process but it does free you from being a victim. You may want to work with a therapist, spiritual counsellor or discover self-help material but it will take some time to shift your victim mindset.

The rewards of freeing yourself from the past are worth it. You are worth it.

For more help with this refer to my blogs

You Have the Power to Heal Your Life – Posted on October 25, 2016

Activate Your Power – Posted on November 15, 2016



Don’t Take Anything Personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

Don Miguel Ruiz



Take the High Road

www.ginarizzo.caWe all know them, those people who suck the life right out of you. Sometimes they are family members, friends or co-workers. You have good intentions of enjoying a night out together and then you feel it, your stomach is turning or you have a slight head-ache.

That person has been talking for about thirty minutes non-stop. You want to run but you can’t, not half way through your meal. You care deeply for this person but you can only handle them in small doses.

Does this make you feel guilty? After all they are your, parents, friend, boss or brother you should be able to put up with this. Or do you feel that you should stand up for yourself because you don’t care to put up with judgements and rude remarks?

So how do you navigate around these moments when you feel your life force just slipping away?

  1. Control the conversation by not saying too much. Unless someone specifically asks for help or advice do not give your opinion, suggestions or recommendations.
  2. Do not chime in with a pleasing attitude of acceptance.
  3. Say nothing and listen or tell them you believe that they will make good decisions.
  4. If you feel they are verbally abusive then you can tell them how you feel or leave. You can also take the high road knowing full well that they are not truly directing their angst toward you. Its their stuff.
  5. You can minimize your visits.

I have noticed that the more upset I get the more it fuels them because after all what they want is attention or to drag you down to their level. Not because they are mean people but they would just feel better if you are at their level of consciousness.

We can’t possibly know what is going on in another’s life. So it comes down to the age old saying – don’t expect others to change, you must be the change.

Taking the high road is not easy which why its called the high road. There’s a lot of climbing and bumpy roads ahead to get to that high road but something tells me its worth it.

Of course I am not for a moment suggesting that there aren’t times when complaining or blabbing doesn’t feel good and we just need to let out our frustration but there is another breed of people who make this a regular part of their lives. Its just too darn exhausting for me.

I’ve had an epiphany, that complaining about people who complain is still complaining!!

There are times when we truly need the help of our loved ones and I believe with all my heart to give your support but then there are those other times when it’s just the same babble, babble all over again when you just have to eat and run.



Anything that you resent and strongly react to in another is also in you.

Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth